“I Don’t Have to Eat All the Egg.”
A lady once wrote a long story. She sent it to a famous editor. After a few weeks the story was returned to her. The lady was angry. She wrote to the editor:
"Dear Sir: Yesterday you sent back a story of mine. How do you know that the story is not good? You did 6 not read it. Before I sent you the story, I pasted together pages 18, 19 and 20. This was a test to see whether8 you would read the story. When the story came back yesterday, the pages were still pasted together. Is this the way you read all the stories that are sent to you?"The editor wrote back: "Dear Madam: At breakfast when I open an egg I don't have to eat all the egg to discover that it is bad.?
editor 编辑paste用浆糊粘
“我不必吃掉整个鸡蛋。”
曾经有位女士，她写了一篇很长的小说，并把它寄给了一位著名的编辑。几周后小说退回来了。女士很生气，她给编辑写了封信。
“尊敬的编辑先生：
昨天你把我的小说退回来了。你怎么知道这小说不好？你根本没有读过。在寄给你之前，我把十八、十九和二十页粘在了一起。这是要检查你是否会读我写的小说。昨天小说退回来时，这三页还粘在一起。难道这就是你阅读所有寄给你的作品的方式吗？”
编辑回信写道：“尊敬的女士：早餐时我打开一只鸡蛋，我不必等到吃完整个鸡蛋后才发现蛋是臭的。”
“I Have Never Heard You in Carmen”
Mark Twain was once invited by a friend to go to the opera. The friend was very rich. He and his wife6 had7 their own8 box at the theatre9. During the opera the friend's wife talked all the time. She also talked rather loudly. She talked so much that it was often difficult for Mark Twain to listen to the opera. Toward12 the end of the opera she turned to Mark Twain and said13, "Oh, my dear Mark Twain, I do want you to be with us again next Friday night. I'm sure you will like it — the opera will be Carmen.""Thank you very much,"said Mark Twain. "That will be fine. I have never heard you in Carmen."
Carmen 《卡门》（歌剧名）
invite3 邀请opera 歌剧box 包厢theatre 剧场，戏院
“我还从未听过你唱卡门”
有一次，一个朋友邀请马克?吐温去看歌剧。这个朋友很有钱。他和他的妻子在剧院有自己的包厢。看歌剧时，朋友的妻子一直在说话。她说话的声音还挺大。她的话那么多，马克?吐温根本听不清歌剧。
歌剧临近结束时，她转而对马克?吐温说：“噢，我亲爱的马克?吐温，我真的想让你再和我们一起度过下周五。我保证你会喜欢的——下周的歌剧是《卡门》。”
“非常感谢，”马克?吐温说。“想来会很好。我还从未听过你唱《卡门》。”
A Barbecue
When I was a child, I once went camping2 with my family in the summer. We decided3 to make a barbecue in the valley4. So we collected some tree sticks to make a fire. My father asked me if I could try to make a fire. I was glad to take the job. Then I tried to set fire to the wood with a match, but produced only smoke. Then my father said, "That's not the right way. I'll show you how to do it. First use the small pieces of wood because they catch fire easily. Then put the larger ones on top of them."My father helped me make a big fire.
barbecue 烧烤valley 山谷stick 枝条make a fire 生火
烧烤
当我还是小孩子的时候，一年夏天我们全家去野营。我们决定在山谷中烧烤，所以我们
捡来了一些树枝生火。父亲问我愿不愿意尝试着生火，我很高兴地承担了这项任务。我试
着用火柴把木头点燃，但结果都是烟。父亲说：“这样做不对。我来教你如何生火。先用
小片的木头，因为它们容易点燃，然后把大些的放在它们上面。”父亲帮我点起了旺旺的
火
A Bus Ride
One day I was on a bus. I found an elderly woman standing1 in front of me. She had a big bag in her hand. "It's a virtue2 for a young person to help the old,"I said to myself.
When I was standing up to give my seat to the old lady, a young foreigner got up quickly saying, "Please sit down."The old lady thanked him and sat down.
She looked very happy.
I was a little embarrassed because I was sitting in the middle of the bus.
Suddenly a pregnant3 woman got onto the bus. I quickly stood up to give up my seat to her. The foreigner smiled at me. He said that he was an Australian,and was a student studying Chinese culture in China.
ride 骑马、骑脚踏车或乘坐公共交通工具旅行elderly 年长的
virtue 美德pregnant 怀孕的
乘公共汽车
一天，我在一辆公共汽车上。我发现一位年长的妇人站在我的面前，她手里拿了个大包。“帮助老人是年轻人的美德。”我对自己说。
当我正要站起来把自己的座位让给那位老妇人时，一个年轻的外国人很快站了起来，说：“请这里坐。”
老妇人谢谢他，然后坐下，她看上去非常高兴。
我有一点尴尬，因为我坐在车厢的中间。突然一个孕妇上了车。我很快地站起来把座位让给了她。那个外国人笑着看着我，他说他是澳大利亚人，正在中国学习中国文化
A clever Servant
Once upon1 a time, there lived a rich man. He had a servant. He and the servant loved wine and good food very much. Each time the rich man left his home; the servant would drink the wine and eat up all the nice food in the house. The rich man knew what his servant did, but he had never caught his servant doing it.
One morning, when he left home, he said to the servant, "Here are two bottles of poison2 and some nice food in the house. You must take care of them."With these words, he went out.
When the rich man was away from his home, the servant enjoyed a nice meal.
When the rich man came back, he couldn's find his food and wine. He became very angry. So he asked the servant, "Where are my wine and food?"The servant said a cat had eaten up the food. He was afraid to be punished3 so he drank the poison to kill himself.
servant 仆人
poison 毒药
聪明的仆人
从前，有一个有钱人，他有一个仆人，他和他的仆人都喜欢好酒和美食。每当富人离开家后，仆人就喝酒，吃光家里所有好吃的东西。富人知道仆人的所作所为，但他从来没有当场抓住过。
一天早上，当富人离开家时，他对仆人说：“家里有两瓶毒药和一些好吃的食物。你必须好好照看它们。”说完，他就走了。
当富人离开家后，仆人尽情享受了一顿美味大餐。富人回来后，不到食物和酒，他很生气。他问仆人：“我的酒和食物到哪里去了？”仆人说有一只猫吃光了所有食物，他怕受到惩罚就喝下了毒药以结束自己的性命。wrote怎么读
A Dish1 Washer
Some people have dogs or cats as2 pets. One woman in New York keeps a monkey as her pet. This monkey can wash dishes3. He washes the dishes for the woman everyday4. He likes to wash dishes and never breaks a
dish. Sometimes he washes the same dishes over and over. If the woman tries to stop him, he then gets angry.
He begins to throw the dishes in all directions6. But this does not happen very often.
The woman's husband7 is very happy with the monkey. The husband never needs to help his wife8 wash the dishes. The monkey does all this work. The husband says that he cannot understand how anybody9, a person10 or a monkey, can like to wash dishes so much.
direction5 方向
洗碗工
有些人的宠物是猫或狗。纽约的一位妇女养了只猴子当宠物。这只猴子会洗碗。他每天为这个妇女洗碗。他喜欢洗并且从未打破过一个碗碟。有时他会一遍遍地清洗同一个碗。如果这个妇女试图阻止，猴子就会发脾气，并开始朝四面八方扔碗碟。但这种情况不常发生。
女人的丈夫非常满意这只猴子。他从不需要帮自己的妻子洗碗。猴子包办了这些活。这个丈夫说他无法理解，不管是谁，人还是猴子，怎么会如此喜欢洗碗呢。
A Duck and a Shop Clerk
A duck walked into a store and asked the clerk, "Do you have any grapes?Theclerk said no, and the duck left. The next day, the duck returned and asked,"Do you have any grapes?"The clerk again said no, and the duck left. The dayafter that, the duck walked into the store again and asked "Do you have
anygrapes?"The clerk shouted at the duck, "You've come in here the past two daysand asked if we had any grapes. I told you every time that we don's have anygrapes! If you come back in here again, and ask for grapes, I'll nail yourwebbed feet to the floor!!"The duck left, and returned the next day. This timehe asked, "Do you have any nails??The clerk replied, "No,"and the duck said,"Good! Got any grapes?
webbed 有蹼的
鸭子和店员
一只鸭子走进商店，他问店员：“有葡萄吗？”店员说没有，鸭子离开了。第二天，鸭子又回来问：“有葡萄吗？”店员再次说没有，鸭子又离开了。再后一天，鸭子又走进商店问：“有葡萄吗？”店员对着鸭子大叫：“过去的两天你都到这里来问有没有葡萄。我每次都告诉你我们这里没有葡萄。要是你以后再来问有没有葡萄，我就把你的脚蹼钉在地板上！”鸭子离开了，但是第二天他又来了。这次他问：“有钉子吗？”店员回答：“没有。”鸭子说：“太好了！那有葡萄吗？”
A Forgetful Person
Once there lived an old man in a town. He always forgot things. So then hewent out, his wife always s
aid to him, "Don's forget this."One day he went ona long trip alone. He went to the station and bought a ticket.
Then he boarded the train. About an hour later, the conductor began to checktickets. He came to the old man and said, "Will you please show me yourticket?"The old man looked for his ticket in all his pockets, but he could notfind it. "I surely bought a ticket, but I cannot find it,"said the old man. "Ibelieve you bought a ticket. All right. You don's have to buy another ticket"said the conductor kindly1, but the old man still looked worried and said, "IfI don's find my ticket, I cannot remember my station. Where am I going?"
forgetful 健忘的
board 上（船、飞机等）
conductor 乘务员，售票员
surely 肯定地
一个健忘的人
从前，在一个镇里住着一位老人。他总是忘记事情。所以当他出门时，他的妻子总是对他说，“不要忘记这个。”
一天，他要独自出趟远门。他去火车站买了票。
随后，他上了火车。大约一小时后，乘务员开始查票。他走到老人面前说：“可以把你的票给我看一下吗？”老人翻遍了口袋，怎么也不到他的票。“我肯定买了票，但我不到了。”老人说。“我相信你买了票。好吧。你不用补票了。”乘务员和善地说。但是老人看上去仍然非常着急，他说：“如果我不到我的票，我就记不起该在哪个站下车。我是要去哪里呢？”
A Free Show
Jack1 lived in a village. As his father was very poor, Jack had little pocket money. One day a circus came to the village. Jack was very fond of going to the circus. He wanted to go very much, but he had no money. After lunch Jack went out and wandered slowly round the circus tent. Inside the tent the band was playing music and people were shouting happily. Jack was excited, so he tried putting his head first through a small opening in the tent. Just then, a guard found Jack out. "Hey, this is not an entrance,"he shouted and pulled him out.
Then Jack went to the back of the tent. There was another opening. Another guard was standing2 there. This time Jack turned backwards3 and tried to enter with his legs first. When the guard saw him, he shouted, "Hey, this is not an exit. You can's leave from here."He pushed Jack into the tent. So Jack got to see the Circus after all.
pocket money 零花钱band 乐队entrance 入口