You'll Never Be Famous-And That'sOK
By Emily Esfahani Smith'
1 Today's college students desperately want to change the world, but too many think that living a meaningful life requires doing something extraordinary and remarkable like becoming an Instagram star, starting a wildly successful company or ending a humanitarian crisis.
2 Having hopes and dreams for the future is ,of course ,part of being young .But thanks to social media , purpose and  meaning have become merged with prestige :Extraordinary  lives look like the norm on the Internet .Yet the idea that a  meaningful life must be or appear remarkable is not only  limited but also misguided .Over the past five years ,I've interviewed dozens of people across the country about  what gives their lives meaning ,and I've read through thousands of pages of psychology ,philosophy and neuroscience research to understand what truly brings people satisfaction .
3 The most meaningful lives ,I've learned ,are often not  the extraordinary ones .They're the ordinary ones lived  with dignity .
4 There's perhaps no better expression of that wisdom  than George Middlemarch ,a book I think every  college student should read .At 700-some pages ,it requires  devotion and discipline ,which is kind of the point .Much  like a meaningful life ,the completion of this book is  hard-won and requires effort .The heroine of the novel  is Dorothea Brooke ,a wealthy young gentlewoman in  a provincial English town .Dorothea has a passionate  nature and yearns to accomplish some good in the world  as a philanthropist .The novel's hero ,Tertius Lydgate , is an ambitious young doctor who hopes to make  important scientific discoveries .Both hope to lead epic lives .
5 Both Dorothea and Tertius end up in disastrous  marriages-she to the preacher Mr .Casaubon ,he to the  town beauty Rosamond .Slowly ,their dreams wither away .
Rosamond ,who turns out to be vain and superficial ,wants Tertius to pursue a career paying enough to support her extraordinary tastes ,and by the end of the novel ,he yields ,
abandoning his scientific quest to become a doctor to the  rich .Though conventionally'
" successful", he dies at 50believing himself a failure for not following through on his  original life plan .
6 As for Dorothea , after the Reverend Casaubon dies , she marries her true love ,Will Ladislaw .But her larger  ambitions go unrealized .At first it seems that she ,too ,has  wasted her potential .
7 Tertius's tragedy is that he never reconciles himself to his dull reality .Dorothea's triumph is that she does .
8 By novel's end ,she settles into life as a wife and a  mother ,and becomes ,Eliot writes ,the "foundress” of  nothing ".It may be a letdown for the reader ,but not  for Dorothea .She pours herself into her roles as mother  and wife with " beneficent activity which she had not  the doubtful pains of discovering and marking out for herself ".
glamour
9 Looking out of her window one day ,she sees a family  making its way down the road an
d comes to the realization  that she needs to begin to live in the moment .Rather than  give in to the despair of disappointed dreams ,she embraces  her life as it is and contributes to those around her as  she can .Eliot's final words on Dorothea ,which is one of the most beautiful passages in literature ,capture what a  meaningful life is about :connecting and contributing to  something beyond the self ,in whatever humble form that may take .
10 Most young adults won't achieve the idealistic goals  they've set for themselves .They won't become the next Mark Zuckerberg .They won't have death notices that run  in newspapers like this one .But that doesn't mean their  lives will lack significance and worth .We all have a circle  of people whose lives we can touch and improve ,and we can find our meaning in that .
11 A new and growing body of research within psychology  about meaningfulness confirms the wisdom of Eliot's  novel-that meaning is found not in success and glamour  but in the ordinary .One research study showed that  adolescents who did household chor
es felt a stronger sense  of purpose .Why ?The researchers believe it's because  they're contributing to something bigger :their family .Another study found that cheering up a friend was an  activity that created meaning in a young adult's life .People who see their occupations as an opportunity to serve their  immediate community find more meaning in their work , whether it's an accountant helping his client or a factory  worker supporting her family with a paycheck .
12 As students head to school this year ,they should  consider this :You don't have to change the world or find  your one true purpose to lead a meaningful life .A good  life is a life of goodness ,and that's something anyone can  aspire to ,no matter their dreams or circumstances .